Illusion of Innocence
by IckleSickle
Summary: PREQUEL to Innocence Lost (which has a lot of typos, sorry!). PLOT: Sirius finds out a devastating secret about Remus, and tries to save him in his clumsy way. Confusion, romance. Remus/OC, Remus/Sirius. Underage prostitution, explicit sex and drug use (cannabis).


Sirius' mouth hung slightly open as he tried to make sense of what he was seeing.

He had borrowed the Cloak from James, thinking about visiting the Kitchens. Instead, he found himself hiding in a corner of an abandoned classroom, frozen in place and rendered speechless by what was happening infront of him.

His fellow 5th year, Remus Lupin, pushed himself to sit on a desk as a 7th year Ravenclaw stepped close and kissed him. Sirius recognized the boy from their Quidditch team, he was one of the chasers. The werewolf allowed the kiss, but didn't seem too eager to respond. After a while of exploring each others' mouths the older boy's hands pushed a bit under Remus' jumper, and the prefect pulled back.

"Do you have the goods?" he asked in a cold tone Sirius had never heard before.

The Ravenclaw, '_Warsinsky_', Sirius thought idly, went through his pockets and then placed two packets of cigarettes on the table next to them. Remus huffed and smiled without humor, before looking back at the boy.

"That'll earn you a handjob", the pale boy muttered lazily, and Sirius had to press his mouth against his sleeve to muffle a shocked gasp.

Warsinsky licked his lips and pulled a small pouch from the same pocket, dangling it in the air. Even in the dim lighting, the animagus could see Remus' nose quiver ever-so-sightly and eyes sparkle with interest.

"How about this?" the older boy asked, his voice husky and confident.

"Hmm, I'll suck you off", Remus offered softly, smiling widely now, amber eyes still on the small baggy. "Twice."

He added the last part when the other boy made a displeased sound at his offer.

"Three times. And I want you to be naked."

"I don't do that", the younger boy said sharply and started to slide himself off the table, only to be pushed back against it.

"Fine, clothes on. But three times", the Ravenclaw whispered and kissed him again, more insistently this time.

The two boys stayed liplocked for what seemed like forever to Sirius. He had never seen Remus in this light. He hadn't known he liked boys. He hadn't known he liked anyone! Was this really the same bookish, soft-spoken boy infront of him, moaning as the taller boy licked his lips and mouth, allowing rough hands to smooth over his thighs before slipping to cup his arse?

Warsinsky groaned as a pale hand pressed against his groin and rubbed. The Ravenclaw pulled back and sank onto a nearby chair, grinning. Remus quickly followed, smoothly dropping to his knees and crawling between the older boy's thighs. As nimble fingers started working on the fastenings of Warsinsky's trousers, Sirius was afraid they would hear his heart thumping in his chest.

Warsinsky groaned and pushed his fingers into Remus' wavy hair. The werewolf pulled out the other boy's curved erection and wrapped his lips around it without hesitation, and the long-haired animagus muffled another gasp and tried to tear his eyes away from the vulgar scene, failing.

"I'm so close", the Ravenclaw panted after mere moments, eyes fixed on the boy whose head was bobbing up and down with relentless speed. "You're too good at this, I'm going to c-co -"

That was all he managed before his fingers tightened in Remus' honey-brown hair and he threw his head back, groaning. Sirius saw his friend's Adam's apple move as the boy swallowed dutifully before pulling away and standing up. After he'd brushed the dust off his trousers and smoothed his hair, he looked weirdly normal, only his red, swollen mouth a reminder of what he had just done.

It took a moment for Warsinsky to regain control over his muscles. Remus waited patiently as the older boy caught his breath and finally tucked his softening cock back in his pants. The chaser stood slowly, and smiled at Remus a bit shakily.

"Can I see you next Tuesday? Same time, same place?" he asked as he watched the younger boy pick up one of the packets of cigarettes.

"I'm taking this", the werewolf said as he held up the small box, and continued when the other seemed like he was about to argue. "It's not like you smoke, Mr Quidditch Player, and you said I was _'too good'_. I earn a little extra."

A wolfish grin twisted his mouth for a second, making Sirius shiver in his corner.

"And yes, Tuesday is fine. But tell Draxter to shut his mouth, or mine will never go near his cock again."

"It wasn't Draxter who -", the Ravenclaw tried to deny, blushing furiously, but the pale boy interrupted him coldly.

"Whatever. Tell the person who told you, whoever it might be", Remus said and flattened the pouch so he could push it in the pack with the smokes.

"Yeah", Warsinsky said quietly after taking the remaining cigarettes and pocketing them. He inched towards the door. "So... till Tuesday?"

"Till Tuesday", Remus agreed with a small smile which disappeared the second the other boy was out of sight.

The pale boy sighed and leaned against a table. He looked tired and worried as he played with the small cardboard box, eyes downcast. Sirius wondered if he should try to sneak out of the room, and had already decided to, when the werewolf stopped him dead in his tracks.

"Didn't mean for you to find out", he said quietly, eyes scanning the part of the room where his dormmate was hiding. "Wanna go smoke some pot, Padfoot?"

A nervous half-smile played on his lips, and though the other Marauder had been about to escape, he couldn't abandon Remus when the boy looked this vulnerable. He swallowed and let the Cloak slide from his shoulders.

"What was that about?" the animagus asked, his voice thin.

"That", Remus said dryly, smile fading. "was a business transaction."

"So you're selling yourself?" Sirius barked a humourless laugh and dared to walk to his friend. "You're a whore?"

"I guess so", the werewolf said evenly, his amber-gold eyes dropping to stare at the cigarettes he was still playing with. "Do you want to smoke with me or shall I go by myself? Either is fine, but it's past curfew and I don't want to loiter."

The words were typical Remus, but they felt foreign in the situation. The pale boy looked withdrawn and a bit hurt. Impulsively, Sirius threw his arms around the him and hugged him tight.

"You're crushing my smokes", the werewolf mumbled against his shoulder, but hugged him back with the arm that wasn't trapped between them.

"I'll get you more", the black-haired boy gasped against the light-brown hair, suddenly realizing that tears threatened to fall. "You don't have to, you don't..."

Remus separated from him and the look in his eyes warned Sirius not to say more. Unshed tears blurred the long-haired boy's vision for a moment before settling. He sniffled and scratched his arm as the prefect pocketed the goods and pulled him closer before draping the Cloak over them.

"C'mon", the werewolf said quietly.

Keeping his hand on Sirius' arm, he walked them through hallways and a secret passage, ending at the foot of the Astronomy Tower. They climbed the stairs in silence, and at the top, Remus shrugged the Cloak off himself and stepped under the clear night sky, smiling happily up at the stars and waning moon. With a flick of his wand he conjured a couple of thick blankets and large, plump pillows. After kicking his shoes off, he slumped down and lay back, continuing his stargazing with arms crossed behind his head.

Sirius hesitated before toeing of his own shoes and sitting down next to his friend, twisting the Cloak in his hands like it was his lifeline. The werewolf's eyes glinted as he glanced at the nervous boy next to him, face unreadable. Remus sighed and sat up, pulling out the pack of cigarettes, and the folded pouch from inside it. A soft breeze carried a rich, earthy scent to Sirius, who breathed it in, intrigued.

"You've only smoked fags, haven't you?" Remus asked quietly, making rolling paper appear with a quiet snap of his fingers.

Sirius just nodded his head and stared as the slender digits crumbled green buds onto the paper, broke a cigarette and added a bit of tobacco before rolling with practised movements. He held the ready blunt in his hands for a moment.

"It's different. Just say if it feels too weird."

After that Remus stuck the joint between his lips and drew in a deep breath as he held the glowing tip of his wand against the end. He put his wand down, and relaxed visibly as he let the thick smoke out. He took another, smaller puff before handing it over to Sirius.

The had been staring at the kiss-bruised lips and was now weirdly aware that his mouth was in second-hand contact with the Ravenclaw's privates. The smoke was thicker and more aromatic than a regular cigarette, and made him cough a bit, but he still liked it.

He handed the blunt back and couldn't tear his eyes away when Remus' mouth molded around it again, cheeks hollowing ever-so-slightly when he sucked. Had the werewolf's lips always looked so soft? He felt the amber eyes on himself as he took the smoke and inhaled, and he held it back blindly, not daring to look.

They smoked silently, gazing at the sky. Sirius started to feel woozy and a bit restless, so he lay back on the pillows. He wasn't aware of closing his eyes before he felt a quilt wrapped around him.

He blinked as he saw the pale boy bent over him, hair falling around his face. His wide eyes were a bit bloodshot, and the black-haired boy frowned.

"Have you been crying?" he asked softly.

Remus chuckled and shook his head, a strand of honey-brown hair brushing against his friend's cheek.

"It's the pot, you look the same", he explained quietly, raising the hand that held the last of the blunt. "Last drag, wanna share?"

Without really thinking about what it meant, Sirius nodded and watched the lips suck the remainders of the join before flicking it over the tower's edge. Remus held his breath as he leaned in, waiting for Sirius to open his mouth to inhale. Instead, the animagus pressed his lips against the other boy's and sucked the breath out of him, which was quite easy as the other boy gasped in shock.

The smoke escaped through their noses as Sirius pulled Remus closer and didn't let go. He licked at the soft lips, tasting the blood that was near the surface, and then deeper, where a faint, bitter taste lingered. It didn't deter him in the slightest, instead making his cock throb, thinking about Remus like that. He rolled them over and opened his eyes, breath hitching as he saw his friend.

The werewolf's eyes were wide and glinted gold of the wolf and reflected silver of the starlight. His honey-brown hair spread against the pillows, and his swollen red lips were parted as he panted. Again, Sirius wondered foggily why he hadn't seen this side of Remus before, and then realized he had. He had just been too scared to admit it, but now he felt like nothing was more natural.

"Great stuff", he mumbled and leaned into kiss the other boy again, then sliding to nibble at his jaw and neck.

"Why are you doing this?" Remus asked breathily, fingers twining in the black hair. "You're not gay, you don't like me... I'll stop what I've been doing if you ask, you don't have to pretend -"

"Does this feel like pretend?" the animagus growled low in his throat and rubbed his erection against the other boy's narrow hips.

The honey-haired werewolf drew in a sharp breath, but instead of responding to the other boy like Sirius had hoped, Remus shoved him off and sat up. He looked confused and a bit hurt.

"So you see me sucking cock and decide that hey, that looks like fun? If it's just about sex, then fine, but don't pretend it's anything else", he said tersely.

"Moony", Sirius muttered and shook his head slightly. "it could never be '_just' anything_ with you. I already love you as a friend, it could never be _'just'_..."

He leaned closer to kiss the other boy, trusting actions more than words, but the werewolf ducked his head.

"So, what? What do you want this to be? What do you want us to be?"

Sirius groaned. He wasn't good with labels, he wasn't good at talking, especially not now that the herb he'd smoked making his thoughts fuzzy. He rubbed a hand over his face and looked at Remus again. The other boy looked tense and scared.

"What do _you_ want us to be?" he asked instead of answering.

"I'm asking _you_, Sirius", Remus said quietly, his shoulders slumping, as if he'd had his answer.

"I want you to be with me", the animagus hurried to say, letting go of his hesitations and rushing the words without another thought. "I don't want you to be with other people like that. You don't have to do those things with me, but I don't want you to do them with others. I want to be with you."

The honey-haired boy looked at him, golden eyes wide with shock. Then, a small smile dared to graze his lips.

"I still have to blow Warsinsky, twice", he muttered.

"Let me worry about that", Sirius murmured. "I'll make sure he stays away from you."

He leaned close again, and this time, the werewolf didn't pull away.


End file.
